I currently have a 10, 9, and 5 year old and a newborn. It has been 1 week since the birth of my 4th child. Needless to say it has been a transition for all of the children. This article will review some of the challenges I have faced in this last week and how I have overcome them.
#1 Sibling jealousy: This is inevitable. The one who took it the hardest was the youngest child. She went from being the baby of the family and getting a lot of attention, as she is the only girl. She has has to go through the most changes such as sleeping in her own room and sharing her space with a needy newborn. In her words, " you give all the love to the baby". So here's how to fix it... Allowing her time with the baby, she loves diaper duty, singing to the baby, and holding the bay when he is awake. When baby is sleep, I cuddle with her and watch whatever she wants to watch on tv, or playing her favorite game- even if its a tickle session to put a smile on her face.
Tip:
Give each child their own responsibility & allow them the opportunity to bond with the new baby.
Here’s how to do it:
One person watches the baby when I have to use the restroom (the oldest).
One person helps with diapers (the youngest)
One watches baby during tummy time and ensures that baby doesn't roll over (the middle child)
#2 School: I am currently taking a break from school but plan to return very soon to being my PhD. However, the oldest of the children are school agers, and considering that I had the baby in the middle of the school year and it's only been a week since delivery has been hard. Ensure that they have all items bookbag, uniform, est ready at bedtime; I set several alarms (wake up kids, pray, get dressed, warm the car, time to leave) to stay on task in the morning. Their dad brings them home from school so that I only have to manage the morning routine.
#3 Household duties: Thank the most high for babywearing! Yesterday was my first day up and moving a little around the house. After many children I have arrived at only one bay carrier that works perfectly for a women who is on the move with other children. The baby K'tan. It takes less than 1 minute to put it on, both hands are free for cleaning, cooking, reading, est. Not to mention that it is perfect for skin-to-skin/ kangaroo care.
#4 Breastfeeding management: Exclusive breastfeeding can seem to be difficult when you have multiple children. The #1 key is to make sure that you normalize breastfeeding in the home. All of my children understand what breast are created to do and the purpose they serve which is to feed the baby. The next step is to take it one feeding at a time. Try not to think about how much time it takes to feed the baby. Instead try to wear the baby (again I love my K'Tan), this allows me to move around once baby is latched. I will discuss managing engorgement/tongue-tie/frenotomy/supplementing in another article stay tuned.